It does NOT get easier when your baby is 3 months old, it just gets REAL

So we’re 3 months in.  I was sitting on the front porch after putting Grace and Lucy to bed and heard Lucy…who very obviously had just woken up, screaming at the top of her baby lungs.  Moments later I heard Grace’s trademark “passionate walk” thump, thump, thump (think Ace Ventura).  Thump, thump, thump.  Yep.  She’s awake too.  I just want them both to be asleep at the same time.  Just once.  Just for a few hours.  Dear Lord is that too much to ask???!!?! 

I sat there for a second, sipping my wine.  I took a deep breath and went back into the house. Grace was covered in black mascara.  Did she take my mascara to bed with her?  Did she sneak into our bathroom all stealth like and give herself a makeover in the two minutes since I had put her to bed?   Lucy was still screaming.

 I had to remind myself that this is only temporary.  The waking every two to three hours with my 3 month old.  The constant and unnerving backtalk from my 3 year old.  I just want one day to go by where I don’t have to do things like pick chewed gobs of gum out off of the dog, or try to scrub permanent marker off the kitchen cabinets. Or just one day where I don't get pooped on, or have to pick up poop, or wipe poop off bottoms, or "come look at my poop mama", or "she pooped on me mama".  Any and all poop related things.  I know people all over the world have done this…and survived.  I have friends and family members who have done this…and survived. 

Today I worked out at 9am and decided to stay for 10am long interval endurance…not because it would be great training (in fact it’s probably counter productive). But because today, 3 hero WODS  literally combined together would be easier than taking care of my own children. 

Am I a bad mom? I don’t know.  I don’t think so.  My kids love me.  They drive me insane, but I know they love me and I love them more than words.  But these last few weeks have been rough.  They say it gets easier when your baby is 3 months old.  I am here, telling you all now, THAT is incorrect…it gets REAL when your baby is 3 months old. 

 6am to 6am to 6am.  Those are my hours now.  No paycheck, no bonuses, no sales goals.  Just keep the kids alive and the house not burnt down. 

I’m not complaining.  I know how very blessed I am.  Okay,  I am complaining a little.  This stuff is rough.  And if you see me and I look like I haven’t slept in 2 weeks and I smell like vomit, poop, and old milk…it’s because I haven’t slept in two weeks and I’m covered in vomit, poop, and old milk.